-He was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, Scrooge. A grasping, scraping, clutching covetous old sinner- Indie Ebenezer Scrooge RP AccountWritten by Nyx 2019 BBC/FX and Book Based Icon by @mmediocreman on Twitter
blinded. our muses getting frisky in the dark (wherever).
As much as Scrooge had been reluctant to waste the money initially, he found that he had come to enjoy the occasional theater date with Jacob. Not all the plays were winners, he had to admit, but some of the actors were very talented. On more occasions than not, Scrooge found himself laughing and crying along with the rest of the audience. As someone who’d favored books in his youth–with not much exposure to the stage–the pretense had been hard to get into, at first. Reading allowed him total immersion into a world of his own imagination, whereas with the stage, the audience was limited by what they were seeing in front of them. If a young man was playing the leading lady, one simply had to take it for granted that they were. If a painted piece of wood was taken to be a forest, or some pieces or cotton were understood to be snow, well, it was so.
must a fictional relationship be “healthy” or “functional”? is it not enough to simply watch two made up people destroy each other, hand in unlovable hand???
hey what the fuck is wrong with you people
idk, what is wrong with me? i’m in a healthy and stable relationship with a great partner, i’ve had lots of therapy that has helped me establish strong boundaries and recognize red flags, and i have an active social life and fulfilling career. could it be that i just… like to read books and watch movies and tv shows about dysfunctional people??? you tell me, tumblr user girlcreator!
You’re a bourgeois degenerate who wants to see shitty despicable & violent relationships for your disgusting sense of entertainment— and you should feel fucking ashamed of yourself.
I agree with @girlcreator but I definitely know there’s something wrong with you. People like you are a huge red flag to me. Bad vibes, for sure.
can you weirdos just smoke some fucking weed
shakespeare frantically rewriting macbeth’s marriage to be healthy and adjusted becuase no one will ever want to watch the original
reblog if you’re a bourgeois degenerate who wants to see shitty despicable and violent relationships for your disgusting sense of entertainment (and you should feel fucking ashamed of yourself)
sometimes I’m interacting with a really polite waiter or receptionist and remember that Sartre bit about how waiters are larping being waiters and I ‘realize’ I’m larping being a customer and it adds this unpleasant sheen of unreality to everything. Don’t like Sartre
I think we were discussing in person how a bunch of Obama’s White House staffers were people who had grown up watching the West Wing, and basically did their jobs by larping West Wing characters. I wonder how long it will be before every profession, and indeed every waking moment of life, is enacted out by larping some famous TV show or embedded cultural stereotype. 
𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑮𝑶𝑶𝑫 𝑷𝑳𝑨𝑪𝑬
. ( sentence starters originating from season one of ‘ the good place ’. adjust pronouns as necessary , mature themes are present!)
❛ oh , one question. where am i , who are you , and what’s going on ? ❜ ❛ cool . cool . i have some questions . ❜ ❛ are you sure you want to hear ? ❜ ❛ cool , bring it in , man ! ❜ ❛ you’ll stand by my side no matter what , right ? ❜ ❛ promise me . say it : “ i promise i will never betray you for any reason ” ❜ ❛ somebody forked up . ❜ ❛ i mean , you do get how that’s worse , right ? ❜ ❛ maybe it’s not … ACTUALLY all that bad . ❜ ❛ i’m just asking you to fudge a little bit ! ❜ ❛ i have a stomachache . ❜ ❛ that’s ‘ fun ’ . ❜ ❛ okay , that’s really specific and makes me think that you definitely did do that . ❜ ❛ what a condescending bench . ❜ ❛ let’s just face it , [ name ] , you don’t belong here ! ❜ ❛ this is a putrid , disgusting bowl of ethical soup . ❜ ❛ that was my first time as a fashion “ don’t ” and i was NOT here for it . ❜ ❛ you’re the most self - obsessed person i’ve ever met . ❜ ❛ time to pick a designated driver . ❜ ❛ before you say anything … that’s it , i just don’t want you to say anything . ❜ ❛ we’re gonna bang it out . ❜ ❛ okay , i won’t let you down … starting now . ❜ ❛ remind me what i’m getting out of this again ? ❜ ❛ oh , so NOW i’m supposed to be nice and make friends ? ❜ ❛ i’m telling you , [ name’s ] out to get me . ❜ ❛ i’ve got something you could slip into . ❜ ❛ of course , the opposite might be true . ❜ ❛ huh ! what do you think that means ? ❜ ❛ throwing sand is an excellent way to put out a vodka fire . ❜ ❛ good people make me insecure . ❜ ❛ i would LOVE not to listen to you . ❜ ❛ that’s a very , very bad idea . do NOT be yourself . ❜ ❛ i said a lot of other nice things , toughen up , nerd . ❜ ❛ it’s nothing , it’s a tiny little inconvenience . ❜ ❛ dude , you’re hiding something ! what’s wrong ? ❜ ❛ what’s wrong , what’s wrong , what’s wrong , what’s wrong ? ❜ ❛ what have you done to me , you monster ? ❜ ❛ you are … unbelievable . ❜ ❛ get your story straight , bro . ❜ ❛ i am VEXED , [ name ] . ❜ ❛ you have nothing to prove , not to anybody . ❜ ❛ i know we’ll never be soul mates , but we’re friends . ❜ ❛ i’ve never actually done this before , it was a theoretical fantasy - ❜ ❛ ‘ dEspitE yOuR cONsTaNt MocKerY ~ ’ ❜ ❛ i once posed as a hot prom date for my cousin . ❜ ❛ i even watched all ten seasons of the show ‘friends’ . ❜ ❛ if i feel sympathy for anybody , it’s [ name ] . ❜ ❛ what is all this junk ? ❜ ❛ you devious little monsters , you . ❜ ❛ you have a very ‘ psycho burnout guy mumbling to himself at a library computer ’ type of vibe . ❜ ❛ this is gonna help both of us ! ❜ ❛ we should keep our eyes peeled for twigs who may have a nefarious agenda . ❜ ❛ i just ethic’d you in the face ! ❜ ❛ lies are like tigers . they are BAD . ❜ ❛ we need to cancel this party immediately . ❜ ❛ why do bad things always happen to mediocre people who are lying about their identities ? ❜ ❛ the ends justify the means . ❜ ❛ what are you talking about ?? it’s SO easy to live with a lie . ❜ ❛ i’m not supposed to be here . ❜ ❛ you forgot your own birthday ? ❜ ❛ alright , i will . for you . ❜ ❛ can’t we just chalk this up to a hilarious mistake and move on ? ❜ ❛ can we … skip around , and circle back ? ❜ ❛ why is everyone so jealous of me ? ❜ ❛ oh , hello - you look like a piece of crap . ❜ ❛ hey now , come on , let’s not insult people . ❜ ❛ go get me a drink . ❜ ❛ somebody made a person out of wet mulch and leaves and like … dead slugs , and that’s you . ❜ ❛ did you two go to pound town ? ❜ ❛ i’m better than i used to be . ❜ ❛ alright , i have to ask . is this thing gonna happen ? you and me ? ❜ ❛ you need to stand up for yourself ! ❜ ❛ you’re barely even a regular , functioning person ! ❜ ❛ woah woah woah , you think i’m into [ name ] ? ❜ ❛ i need to step outside for … some air . i will not be back for … many days . ❜ ❛ why are you so nice to me ? ❜ ❛ oh good , you’re back . ❜ ❛ pobody’s nerfect . ❜ ❛ well , the nightmare continues . ❜ ❛ i’m a moron ! ❜ ❛ that’s … not great for my case . ❜ ❛ i’ve ruled the fart inadmissible as evidence . ❜ ❛ now i’m bored . walking is dumb . ❜ ❛ i’m gonna need a drink … or three . ❜ ❛ i only cared about making money and doing cocaine . ❜ ❛ there’s no time for any of that morality nonsense , sweetheart . ❜ ❛ this way , i don’t owe you anything - you don’t owe me anything . ❜ ❛ we MUST remain emotionless . i’m talking kristen stewart on the red carpet . ❜ ❛ please , i’m begging you , please . ❜ ❛ does your brain work , actually ? do you have a functioning head ? ❜ ❛ sorry , [ name ] , but i can’t let us leave . ❜ ❛ what are you DOING , you goon ? ❜ ❛ that’s what you think hell is ? ❜ ❛ it’s scary , like the movie ratatouille . ❜ ❛ oh , that’s a joint . ❜ ❛ REAL weird vibe in here . ❜ ❛ i was definitely expecting some applause . ❜ ❛ in my opinion , which is objective fact in this case and all cases ever … ❜ ❛ i’m not going , i don’t wanna . ❜ ❛ it is literally impossible for me to do that . ❜ ❛ well - it’s been real , dawg . ❜ ❛ i feel like i’ve failed you . ❜ ❛ i was dropped into a cave , and … you were my flashlight . ❜ ❛ we can be together , away from everyone else . ❜ ❛ holy motherforking shirtballs . ❜ ❛ man , this is torture . ❜ ❛ you ruined everything , you know that ? ❜ ❛ i was so close to pulling it off ! ❜ ❛ it’s actually a filthy dumpster of our worth anxieties . ❜ ❛ i’m surrounded by people who are literally better than me . ❜ ❛ you don’t love me ? ❜ ❛ this was supposed to be my big moment ! ❜ ❛ dammit , [ name ] . you are the WORST , and you can all suck it . ❜ ❛ you had no idea i was gonna do that ! ❜ ❛ yeah , that came out of nowhere . ❜ ❛ oh … but it didn’t matter . because my motivations were corrupt . ❜ ❛ there’s something you don’t know about me . ❜ ❛ the only thing you succeeded in doing was bringing us all together . ❜ ❛ uh … next time ? ❜ ❛ if this thing goes sideways again , you are DONE . ❜ ❛ UGH , you’re useless ! ❜ ❛ alright , let’s try again , shall we ? ❜ ❛ YA BASIC . ❜ ❛ hold that thought . is it okay if i go work out ? ❜ ❛ i think this is yours . ❜
quotes are all taken from various poems out of richard siken’s poetry book crush. feel free to change pronouns/etc if needed.
❝ tell me how all this, and love too, will ruin us. ❞
❝ tell me we’ll never get used to it. ❞
❝ there are so many things i’m not allowed to tell you. ❞
❝ i swallow your heart and it crawls right out of my mouth. ❞
❝ i want it back now, baby. i want it back. ❞
❝ i’m sorry. we know how it works. the world is no longer mysterious. ❞
❝ that’s a nice touch. ❞
❝ i like him and i want to be like him. ❞
❝ i’m sure you remember, i was on the phone with you, sweetheart. ❞
❝ history repeats itself. ❞
❝ there are many names in history, but none of them are ours. ❞
❝ you could drown in those eyes. ❞
❝ but damn if there isn’t anything sexier than a slender boy with a handgun, a fast car, a bottle of pills. ❞
❝ sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine. ❞
❝ i couldn’t get the boy to kill me, but i wore his jacket for the longest time. ❞
❝ you wanted happiness, i can’t blame you for that, and maybe a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy but tell me you love this, tell me you’re not miserable. ❞
❝ there is no way to make this story interesting. ❞
❝ i want to tell you this story without having to confess anything, without having to say that i ran out into the street to prove something. ❞
❝ tell me we’re dead and i’ll love you even more. ❞
❝ you will be alone always and then you will die. ❞
❝ i’m sorry i came to your party and seduced you and left you bruised and ruined, you poor sad thing. ❞
❝ who am i? i’m just a writer. i write things down. ❞
❝ i take it back. ❞
❝ here is the repeated image of the lover destroyed. ❞
❝ you still get to be the hero. ❞
❝ what more do you want? ❞
❝ love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. it’s like a religion. it’s terrifying. ❞
❝ no one will ever want to sleep with you. ❞
❝ you know that recently we have had our difficulties and there are many things i want to ask you. ❞
❝ you had not expected this. ❞
❝ walk a mile in my shoes. ❞
❝ a man takes his sadness down to the river and throws it in the river but then he’s still left with the river. ❞
❝ you are weak and hollow and it doesn’t matter anymore. ❞
❝ hush, my sweet. these tornadoes are for you. ❞
❝ that sounds overly valorous. ❞
❝ do you love yourself? ❞
❝ i don’t have to answer that. ❞
❝ you wanted more. ❞
❝ i had a dream about you. ❞
❝ there’s nowhere to go. there’s nowhere to go. ❞
❝ in these dreams it’s always you: the boy in the sweatshirt, the boy on the bridge, the boy who always keeps me from jumping off the bridge. ❞
❝ will you love me even more when i’m dead? ❞
❝ you didn’t show up. i kept waiting. ❞
❝ i swallowed crushed ice pretending it was glass and you’re dead. ❞
❝ i don’t really blame you for being dead but you can’t have your sweater back. ❞
❝ you can sleep now, you said. you can sleep now. you said that. i had a dream where you said that. thanks for saying that. you weren’t supposed to. ❞
❝ hello darling, welcome home. ❞
❝ please keep him safe. ❞
❝ i just don’t want to die anymore. ❞
❝ you want to die for love, you always have. ❞
❝ you didn’t think you’d feel this way. ❞
❝ you saved my life. i owe you, i owe you everything. ❞
❝ please, just for one night, will you lie down next to me, we can leave our clothes on, we can stay all buttoned up. ❞
❝ you’re all i ever wanted and worth dying for, too. ❞
❝ drive into that tree, drive off the embankment. ______, make something happen. ❞
❝ we are not dirty. ❞
❝ you keep singing along to that song i hate. stop singing. ❞
